Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Why don't I count, but want to count you.

Here are some reasons why I should be President:
  • Parents and other folks, who hoped the best for me, when I was growing up, always reminded me that, when I grow up, I can become President one day. When I was little, the future, hoped for by my elders, seemed to hold such promise. Men were walking on the moon when I first opened my eyes to this world. No generation born before me was witness to an event as momentous, unifying and pivotal to the future of mankind and sadly no generation, after mine, was born with men looking down from the heavens, covering the world with the tip of their thumbs as they crossed the plains of Frau Moro. What went wrong for me? For us? I got on the ride, we call life, at it's absolute climax and it has been downhill, for all of us, since.
  • The Constitution states the I have to be 35 years old and a citizen of the United States. That part was easy. The Poll Tax is abolished so pretty much everyone can vote for me. But in order to get my name on the ballot, I have to file a lot of paperwork. But the paperwork is different in each of the fifty states and I have no idea what the rules are for ballots for ex-patriots and the outlaying territories. If the Democrats and Republicans can bearly manage to get on every ballot, what chance do I have?
  • In school they taught me in social studies and government class that anyone can be elected in this country. They even taught by example, holding elections for the student body. This was my first exposure to the truth, because it brought me face to face with the popularity contest we Americans pass of as Democracy. I declined the encouragement of my teachers to run for office. I did not feel compelled to stand in front of the student body and do my rendition of Sally Fields' Oscar acceptance speech. If I wanted it bad enough like Pedro, I could have won an office, I just don't think I would have treated the office with any respect. The rewards of office rang hollow to me, if I had only to say anything to get it. The people who got elected to the student body were rewarded with the responsibilities vital to the education of the students who saw fit to put them in charge of organizing dances and putting the yearbook together. WOW! I don't know how I could have gotten through school if the popular clicks weren't slavishly toiling away at paper streamers and glitter decorations. But then again you only get out of something what you put into it. Is' my fault for not wanting more out of student government, but they did give me the chance to learn what self-government is and is not. Thank you teachers for that.
  • I've managed, so far, to not get convicted of any treasonable offense. I'm not sure how long my luck will hold out, since almost anything you do or say can be construed to run afoul of the Patriot Act nowadays. But that's all I have to say about that.

Here are just a few of the reasons why I can't be President:

Those nice old folks and my parents never mentioned that I would have to find a way to spend nearly a billion dollars to convince people to vote me into office.

There are only two ways to spend that kind of money.

  1. I have to take it out of my own assets.
  2. Or, I have to convince, cajole, connive, beg, borrow or steal it from someone else.

I am not a billionaire so option one is out of the question for me. Thanks to the generous tax policies and boom markets of the previous administrations, there are lots of fresh billionaires who can spend that much or even ten times the going rate for the office. It turns out that most of them are content to sit on the sidelines and only the 'loons' have tried to buy their way into the office. In fact more billionaires have spent more time and money trying to get off the planet than have gone into politics. Does that relfect more poorly on their priorities or the value of being president?

Option two is the popular path to the oval office. Why risk your fortune when you can find plenty of others willing to advance their interests through your ambition. I can't bring myself to do this. I can't fool myself into thinking that rising through the ranks of a political party won't leave me beholding to others that have put me in the spotlight. I can't abide by a platform based on capturing the slightest majority of the electoral college demographic. The president is supposed to read, comprehend and execute the duties of the Constitution as the leader for every single American. Very few of the recent ones have had the self-discipline to constrain his focus to the tasks laid out in the Constitution.

In the movie 300, Xerxes's proclaims that he is willing to sacrifice the lives of all his armies for his glory and kingdom and King Leonidas retorts that he, on the other hand,is willing to die for any of his men. For any of you who watched this scene, how many of the presidents who have served as your Commander-in-Chief can you imagine to be like Leonidas? How many of them resemble Xerxes? In all honesty, how many, if any, have lived up to your expectations as your leader?

It is a hard job, and it is very hard on the mind and body of the one who becomes President, but that still does not excuse the recent lack of quality and integrity of those to hold the office. The choices we have for this office are only as good as the process by which they are elected. This system only leaves room for those with the money, cunning and guile to wield enough influence to prevail. No one can consider honorable the methods by which our candidates for president are selected.

I foolishly continue to hope that my choice for the next leader will be based on my faith to entrust in someone who can do a better job of it than I can. Someone who will uphold and defend the Constitution in it's entirety. Someone who will wake every morning and ask themselves "What do I need to do today to ensure that every single American has an equal chance to do the best for themselves and this country?"

There are, by far, more obstacles to my Presidency, most of them bear some manner of influence on how I can't imagine doing the things, I have studied or witnessed, current and former president commit in the execution of their duties as my president. Any other reasons I can imagine, pale in comparison to the caveat of campaign fiancees. I literally can't afford to get into the rest of my reasons why I can't be the President of the United States of America.

If you, on the other hand, can imagine faithfully executing the duties of the office of the President of the United States, please let me know if you will campaign for the office in 2008. If you can't get yourself on the ballot, I will write you in mine. But first, you have to convince me that every American, not just the ones that vote you in, deserve having you in-charge for four years.

I eagerly await a correspondence with someone worthy of my vote.

A vote that I do not ever wish to make in vain, again.

A vote that I will rigorously protect from the charlatans.

A vote cast in gratitude to the sacrifice of those that defended my right to do so with their lives and limb.

If you feel up to the task, please reply below and convince me that I should trust you with my life, liberty and happiness for the next four years.

If you find yourself disinclined to bear the heavy burden that is the Presidency of the United States please, also, reply below.

Please only recuse or nominate yourselves. If you think higher or lessor of others, then please forward this petition to them. I fully hope to receive a unique reply from every citizen of this country.

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